Chapter 3

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PIMPOLOGY - Chapter 3...

 

What To Do In A Town Where There Is More Guys Than Girls.  If the bars you go to are sausage fests, then you need to distinguish yourselves by dressing well and being aggressive.  Don't let the fellatio ratio scare you off.

 

Lying About Your Age.  I prefer younger woman so I usually shave off a few years.  They all do it too, so don't feel so devious.  Just play stupid later if they find out:  tell them they must've misunderstood you ("22?? no, I said I was twety-six, you must not have heard the four)  .  Watch out and be sure to add those years onto the year you graduated though or you're busted!

 

Hit & Run.  Talk, get their number, and move on!  The longer you work it, the better the chance you'll fuck it up.  If they stay, then you leave or vice-versa.  Use your cell phone for the assumed close. The assumed close is easy; just say "Hey, give me your number and maybe we can go out for a beer sometime."  This works every time.  Then give her a business card so she'll at least remember your name when you call.  Always ask for their number, even if you are unsure..it's an automatic no if you don't ask! Get some balls and do it!!

 

She Says She'll Call You?  No she won't .get her number or walk away.they never, ever call.  Either she has a boyfriend or she isn't into you.Bail. 

 

Random Girl Gives You Her Number Without You Asking.  Don't call her..she's a rabbit boiler. 

 

How To Pickup Chicks That Have Boyfriends.  If he's with her, I don't recommend even trying.  If, however, he's not there, then its fair game.  All is fair in love and war!  If she likes you then she'll give you're her work number and you can sneak around a little.  This is actually quite titillating.  This is not cool, however, if you know the guy.  There are plenty of chicks out there.don't ruin any friendships over them. 

 

 

How To Pickup Strippers.  This one is a little tricky.  I recommend that you find out when the shift change is and start hanging out there a couple of hours before.  Most strip joints change shifts at around 8 PM.  If you get there at 5 or 6, then you have plenty of time to talk to them and convince them to go out to a bar with you when their shift changes.

 

Talk to them like you would any other girl.  Hang out with your boys at a table with a central location and have a good time.  If you go over and sit constantly at the stage then you look desperate.  Just go over once in a while and drop a few ones.  Eventually they will come and talk to you and your friends.  Work it. 

 

Mountain Chicks Vs. City Chicks.  In the city you must be the aggressor because you might never see them again.  In the mountains/small towns, you have to dress down a little and play it cool.  In a small town, the chicks all know all the dudes etc, so they noticed you when you walked in the door.  Play it cool for a while then strike up a conversation.

  

Taking Them Home That Night.    I prefer to run away and live to fight another day.  I find that if I hang out too long I eventually say something stupid and screw it up.  Some guys are all about trying to take them home that night.  However, the odds of pulling them out of there are only good if its after 12:45 and/or getting near closing time.  Try kissing her neck or cheek.  If she responds and you're making out in the bar..then you're taking her home.  Say something like "let's go over to my house.  I live really close and have a nice bottle of wine. I'll make sure you get home in an hour or so.  The so is usually the next day.

 

Beer Goggles.  If your friends say don't do it..then don't.  Dudes will rarely say anything unless she is either really hot, or is total swag.  When they cry swag.go home alone

 

Talk It Out Later With Your Boys.  Always laugh about what worked and didn't the next day with your friends who were with you.  It helps get you psyched and you'll learn from your mistakes and theirs.  Always watch what you say though. It's a good habit to say "having sex" versus "banging."  If a chick hears you saying "yeah, so I'm banging this broad and.." they your done, but if she hears you say "I'm having sex with this girl and." then your still golden. 

 

Blind Dates & Set-Ups

Never, ever, ever go out on a blind date!  It's a totally uncomfortable situation that is bound to fail miserably.  Instead, go for the setup if you can dig one up.  I usually try fishing around my friend's girlfriends and or my female co-workers.  Ask her if she has any cute friends.  If she says yes, get some details and ask for a physical description (preferably a picture).  Ask her to bring her friend to happy hour the next week.  This will allow you the chance to check her out, talk to her, and ask her for her phone number if you see fit.  30-40% of chicks are closet matchmakers.take advantage of that if you can.